A few weeks ago my roots started showing which means that today when I woke up my hair just looked way beyond "natural".

I've been coloring my hair the color that used to be my natural color until I had kids. Or started getting old, I don't know. All I know is that 10 years and 4 kids ago my hair was about 4 shades lighter than what my roots now show.

Coloring your hair 4 shades lighter than it really is does not look natural.

But I'm not sure that I want everyone to see the real me either.

The real me might not be all that happy on the inside even though there is a smile on the outside.

People might see me being the good mother and walking her kids to school when the real me knows that I am trying to make up for my unnecessary angry outburst directed at the ones in my care.

Some might hear me talk of my faith when the real me questions if God is listening or not.

To some it may appear that I have life figured out. The real me has way more questions than answers.

I'm not sure I want everyone to see my true colors.

But I have decided that the hair color I'm using now looks way to fake to look natural on me anymore. I'm going to try a shade or 2 darker.

Maybe as my hair grows and roots are exposed, it won't look so different that what people already see.

And I'm not necessarily talking about my hair.

Come back and visit me here soon. Unless of course, you would rather hear your hair stylist use the two words "Oh SHHHHHHHoot!"....go color your hair instead.